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(no subject)
May. 9th, 2012 05:50 pm[Filter: Private]
I ... think it went well.
I think it did! She seemed like she had fun. It's just like Fayre says -- she just needs to feel special. It wasn't so bad. And ... she really did seem ...
[Filter: Autumn]
Uh ... so ...
Did you ... have fun, last night?
I ... think it went well.
I think it did! She seemed like she had fun. It's just like Fayre says -- she just needs to feel special. It wasn't so bad. And ... she really did seem ...
[Filter: Autumn]
Uh ... so ...
Did you ... have fun, last night?
(no subject)
Apr. 16th, 2012 12:27 am[Filter: Private]
Wow, at least I missed all of that while I was out in the city doing the lottery.
I really wanted to enjoy today. The family that won seemed so happy. This means so much to me, and I should really be enjoying the whole thing. It's my gift to myself. And instead ...
[Filter: Autumn]
Okay, so, like, what's actually going on?! It's my birthday and you're acting like a little bitch! You barely seemed to notice me all day and this is like the only party since Kelita left that you haven't tried to take over. Actually, you didn't even seem to care what was going on with it at all!
Wow, at least I missed all of that while I was out in the city doing the lottery.
I really wanted to enjoy today. The family that won seemed so happy. This means so much to me, and I should really be enjoying the whole thing. It's my gift to myself. And instead ...
[Filter: Autumn]
Okay, so, like, what's actually going on?! It's my birthday and you're acting like a little bitch! You barely seemed to notice me all day and this is like the only party since Kelita left that you haven't tried to take over. Actually, you didn't even seem to care what was going on with it at all!
(no subject)
Mar. 19th, 2012 12:37 am[Filter: Private]
Wow, it's so nice having everything back to normal again.
I'm even ... sort of getting used to not having Kelita here. I really miss her, but we're adapting, I think. I hope. Leigh was right, I guess, like she always is. There's no one who can do everything Kelita did, but there are enough people to do some of it that ...
I do still miss her, though.
Lots.
She's the only person who who really got ...
Well, yeah.
[Filter: Autumn]
Hey! Uh ... great job with all of this! I was looking over everything you have ready, and I think you're actually going to pull this off, even with all the setbacks and the scare over everybody being sick and uh, yeah! So, great job, Autumn! I'm really impressed!
Wow, it's so nice having everything back to normal again.
I'm even ... sort of getting used to not having Kelita here. I really miss her, but we're adapting, I think. I hope. Leigh was right, I guess, like she always is. There's no one who can do everything Kelita did, but there are enough people to do some of it that ...
I do still miss her, though.
Lots.
She's the only person who who really got ...
Well, yeah.
[Filter: Autumn]
Hey! Uh ... great job with all of this! I was looking over everything you have ready, and I think you're actually going to pull this off, even with all the setbacks and the scare over everybody being sick and uh, yeah! So, great job, Autumn! I'm really impressed!
(no subject)
Feb. 20th, 2012 03:10 am[Filter: Private]
Ugh, I don't have time to try and figure out what's bothering Autumn. 'If you don't know, I'm not going to tell you'?? What does that even mean? If you don't tell me what I did wrong, I can't try and fix it, you big baby! Just say it and I can not do it again, is that so hard?
This is so stupid. Every day I realize more and more just how little Father ever actually did. Erana may have been an evil bitch and I may be glad she's dead, but ... if she really did all of this, for so long without anyone ever even knowing ... I guess she was the Queen in her own way, huh? And I guess it makes sense that she was frustrated about it ...
It doesn't excuse anything at all, but the more I do this stupid job ...
Autumn shouldn't even be like -- a thing, with all of this stuff to worry about, but -- errrgh.
[Filter: Daisy]
Hey, uh, listen, have you heard anything about this trial that apparently happened today? A guy right here in Floran has been gathering up girls who've been long term visitors to Hanalan and are trying to get home, and just like ... selling them. Using our docks and our inspections, and ... it's crazy, right?
Anyway, it's going to hell trying to fix all the holes he's poked in the system and I'm wondering if you could maybe help? It's really your jurisdiction, these days, since you and Nathan are Guard now ...
[a long pause]
[Filter: Fayre]
... hi! ... I know it's been a while. ........ got a sec?
Ugh, I don't have time to try and figure out what's bothering Autumn. 'If you don't know, I'm not going to tell you'?? What does that even mean? If you don't tell me what I did wrong, I can't try and fix it, you big baby! Just say it and I can not do it again, is that so hard?
This is so stupid. Every day I realize more and more just how little Father ever actually did. Erana may have been an evil bitch and I may be glad she's dead, but ... if she really did all of this, for so long without anyone ever even knowing ... I guess she was the Queen in her own way, huh? And I guess it makes sense that she was frustrated about it ...
It doesn't excuse anything at all, but the more I do this stupid job ...
Autumn shouldn't even be like -- a thing, with all of this stuff to worry about, but -- errrgh.
[Filter: Daisy]
Hey, uh, listen, have you heard anything about this trial that apparently happened today? A guy right here in Floran has been gathering up girls who've been long term visitors to Hanalan and are trying to get home, and just like ... selling them. Using our docks and our inspections, and ... it's crazy, right?
Anyway, it's going to hell trying to fix all the holes he's poked in the system and I'm wondering if you could maybe help? It's really your jurisdiction, these days, since you and Nathan are Guard now ...
[a long pause]
[Filter: Fayre]
... hi! ... I know it's been a while. ........ got a sec?
(no subject)
Feb. 9th, 2012 12:56 pm[Filter: Private]
Dragons, I really wish Kelita were here. I didn't really realize just how far she went to keep Autumn ... realistic. She's going to beggar the entire treasury just throwing this silly party!
Two thousand long stemmed roses, total? Five hundred burlap sacks full of resh petals to scatter along every flat surface? And let's not even get started on the damn joust. It's like she's expecting the entire Koriner army to show up for this thing!
I promised I'd try to fix the roads this summer. How am I supposed to do that when we're spending this much money on such stuuuuupid things?!
This people, I swear.
Maybe ... maybe I could ask for donations? I could say it's for something else. Or maybe that I could put a sign at every stretch of road with their name on it. If their better nature doesn't work, I can always just appeal to their egos.
[Filter: Public]
... so! I suspect that everyone has heard all about my Lady Autumn's many plans for the big Rose Day party? It's definitely going to be a big enough deal that it'll put even our own history to shame, here! Everyone should be excited. It's going to be amazing!
Autumn certainly does know how to make a fuss.
Dragons, I really wish Kelita were here. I didn't really realize just how far she went to keep Autumn ... realistic. She's going to beggar the entire treasury just throwing this silly party!
Two thousand long stemmed roses, total? Five hundred burlap sacks full of resh petals to scatter along every flat surface? And let's not even get started on the damn joust. It's like she's expecting the entire Koriner army to show up for this thing!
I promised I'd try to fix the roads this summer. How am I supposed to do that when we're spending this much money on such stuuuuupid things?!
This people, I swear.
Maybe ... maybe I could ask for donations? I could say it's for something else. Or maybe that I could put a sign at every stretch of road with their name on it. If their better nature doesn't work, I can always just appeal to their egos.
[Filter: Public]
... so! I suspect that everyone has heard all about my Lady Autumn's many plans for the big Rose Day party? It's definitely going to be a big enough deal that it'll put even our own history to shame, here! Everyone should be excited. It's going to be amazing!
Autumn certainly does know how to make a fuss.
(no subject)
Jan. 5th, 2012 01:37 am[Filter: Private]
This is off to a great new start. What is wrong with her, sometimes? Geez.
-- I wonder if filters still work. They should. Nobody saw me talking with Leigh. Did they? ... hello? Anybody? Is anybody ...
Eh, whatever. If they're broken, I'm already in so much trouble. What's a little more.
[Filter: Autumn]
Come on, Autumn, open the door. Everybody down at court is super worried about you after you ran out crying like that ...
This is off to a great new start. What is wrong with her, sometimes? Geez.
-- I wonder if filters still work. They should. Nobody saw me talking with Leigh. Did they? ... hello? Anybody? Is anybody ...
Eh, whatever. If they're broken, I'm already in so much trouble. What's a little more.
[Filter: Autumn]
Come on, Autumn, open the door. Everybody down at court is super worried about you after you ran out crying like that ...
(no subject)
Nov. 30th, 2011 04:42 pm[Filter: Leigh]
Everybody here is crazy, Leigh. I swear, they're all just completely nuts. They argue so much about things that don't matter at all. They think they're all so important and everything they do matters so much, and these things that really don't make a difference become so life and death that they all hurt each other over it.
Why don't any of them realize just how lucky they are? Their lives are frigging perfect! Somedays, I just -- I really just wish --
Everybody here is crazy, Leigh. I swear, they're all just completely nuts. They argue so much about things that don't matter at all. They think they're all so important and everything they do matters so much, and these things that really don't make a difference become so life and death that they all hurt each other over it.
Why don't any of them realize just how lucky they are? Their lives are frigging perfect! Somedays, I just -- I really just wish --
(no subject)
Oct. 18th, 2011 04:16 am[Filter: Private]
Uggggh Autumn!
I stopped writing here for a reason, okay? It was too weird! I'm trying to be a King, here. Dragons know I'm the one actually doing it. How am I supposed to seem kingly if I'm telling my magic journal all about my personal crap?
But she insists, like she insists on everything. I swear, she's going to end up Queen after all. She's going to bully me into marrying her and I'll do it just because I'm tired of saying no. And then she'll make all the laws and all the policies and declare wars everytime tariffs rise on Atsirian lace and Hanalan will be destroyed.
Dragons! She's tireless.
Well, fine. Whatever.Maybe L
[Filter: Public]
Autumn and I went to a concert at the Rosewood tonight. Maybe you've all heard about that, she says that she's writing here now. She'd been bothering me to get her and I in for weeks now, so she's pretty ecstatic about the whole thing. Though now she wants to go again, and sit in the royal box next time.Never mind that admission could feed
It was pretty good.
Uggggh Autumn!
I stopped writing here for a reason, okay? It was too weird! I'm trying to be a King, here. Dragons know I'm the one actually doing it. How am I supposed to seem kingly if I'm telling my magic journal all about my personal crap?
But she insists, like she insists on everything. I swear, she's going to end up Queen after all. She's going to bully me into marrying her and I'll do it just because I'm tired of saying no. And then she'll make all the laws and all the policies and declare wars everytime tariffs rise on Atsirian lace and Hanalan will be destroyed.
Dragons! She's tireless.
Well, fine. Whatever.
[Filter: Public]
Autumn and I went to a concert at the Rosewood tonight. Maybe you've all heard about that, she says that she's writing here now. She'd been bothering me to get her and I in for weeks now, so she's pretty ecstatic about the whole thing. Though now she wants to go again, and sit in the royal box next time.
It was pretty good.
(no subject)
Jan. 1st, 2011 12:15 am[Filter: Private]
It's an obselete thing that takes up too much money and feeds on the lower class. Some days, I just wish I could get rid of it, right now.
But ... it can be so beautiful, too. Tonight, I feel like a murderer for even thinking about getting rid of it like I have been.
I wish I could talk to Lei
No, I need to stop relying on that. Maybe she's never going to write again. I knew she wanted to leave completely after the Honeysuckle Treason. I have to learn to get along without her. Make my own choices. I don't want to be my father.
[Filter: Public]
Autumn has made such a big deal about this thing she wanted me to wear at the New Year ball tonight. I was sure it was going to be awful, after how she's gone on and on about it, but ... it's actually ... nice. It suits my colouring and it's tasteful, and I've had people coming up and telling me I look handsome all evening.
She's smug about it, glowing on my arm, but we do look nice together.
It's an obselete thing that takes up too much money and feeds on the lower class. Some days, I just wish I could get rid of it, right now.
But ... it can be so beautiful, too. Tonight, I feel like a murderer for even thinking about getting rid of it like I have been.
No, I need to stop relying on that. Maybe she's never going to write again. I knew she wanted to leave completely after the Honeysuckle Treason. I have to learn to get along without her. Make my own choices. I don't want to be my father.
[Filter: Public]
Autumn has made such a big deal about this thing she wanted me to wear at the New Year ball tonight. I was sure it was going to be awful, after how she's gone on and on about it, but ... it's actually ... nice. It suits my colouring and it's tasteful, and I've had people coming up and telling me I look handsome all evening.
She's smug about it, glowing on my arm, but we do look nice together.
(no subject)
Nov. 27th, 2010 12:28 am[Filter: Rae]
Uh, hey, Rae.
... got a minute to talk? I have a question. Don't worry, it's not about you. At all, actually. It's just -- I just don't know who else to ask.
Uh, hey, Rae.
... got a minute to talk? I have a question. Don't worry, it's not about you. At all, actually. It's just -- I just don't know who else to ask.
(no subject)
Oct. 30th, 2010 08:59 am[Filter: Kelita]
I hate this, why does it have to be such a big deal?
Yes, I'd rather spend the night out in the city than at court. What's the problem with that?! Why does that have to be a big deal?
These people all think that they're the centre of Hanalan. What do any of them actually contribute? The nobles don't even govern like in other countries! They're just here to entertain us, and they think that the world revolves around them!
The real Hanalan is out there. Those are the people who keep this country running. The farmers and the blacksmiths and the shepherds and the winers and the grocers! They're Hanalan! Why is it so awful to think my time might be better spent being among them then strolling around a ballroom with Autumn hanging on my arm, making small talk?
I hate this, why does it have to be such a big deal?
Yes, I'd rather spend the night out in the city than at court. What's the problem with that?! Why does that have to be a big deal?
These people all think that they're the centre of Hanalan. What do any of them actually contribute? The nobles don't even govern like in other countries! They're just here to entertain us, and they think that the world revolves around them!
The real Hanalan is out there. Those are the people who keep this country running. The farmers and the blacksmiths and the shepherds and the winers and the grocers! They're Hanalan! Why is it so awful to think my time might be better spent being among them then strolling around a ballroom with Autumn hanging on my arm, making small talk?
(no subject)
Oct. 16th, 2010 03:02 am[Filter: Private]
I don't know what she's expecting.
I mean, we messed around a tiny little bit before I left, and then I come back and she thinks that we're offically courting or something? And I don't say we're not, and then she's going around saying that we definitely are?
Does she think I'm going to make her Queen, or something? There's no way. Autumn would be like, the worst Queen ever. Ever. And I should at least marry one of the old nobility, if not a noble from another country who can give us something. That's how we do things in Hanalan. Autumn's just a courtier.
But is that what she wants? I don't know! I don't get girls. She wants something, but maybe all she does want is uh, yeah. And I'm definitely willing to give that, but she's so hard to read and I don't want her running away if I try something, yelling that the Prince tried to take advantage of her.
I sure wish I'd gotten that far with Fayre. Maybe I'd know what I was doing.
... I sure wish I'd heard from Leigh lately. It's like she disappeared. She'd tell me what was going on, and then call me names for not knowing in the first place. As if she'd do any better with someone like Autumn! I'd be surprised if anyone had ever kissed Leigh in her entire life.
Ugh, I have so much actual stuff that matters to worry about, why is all I can think about Autumn.
[Filter: Public]
Well, Miss Lydia, I did what you asked and replaced Autumn's ruined shoes for her. You were right, I think she nearly swooned when she removed all of the wrappings, and she's been showing them off all day. You might have even seen her, actually.
She's like the cat in the cream.
I don't know what she's expecting.
I mean, we messed around a tiny little bit before I left, and then I come back and she thinks that we're offically courting or something? And I don't say we're not, and then she's going around saying that we definitely are?
Does she think I'm going to make her Queen, or something? There's no way. Autumn would be like, the worst Queen ever. Ever. And I should at least marry one of the old nobility, if not a noble from another country who can give us something. That's how we do things in Hanalan. Autumn's just a courtier.
But is that what she wants? I don't know! I don't get girls. She wants something, but maybe all she does want is uh, yeah. And I'm definitely willing to give that, but she's so hard to read and I don't want her running away if I try something, yelling that the Prince tried to take advantage of her.
I sure wish I'd gotten that far with Fayre. Maybe I'd know what I was doing.
... I sure wish I'd heard from Leigh lately. It's like she disappeared. She'd tell me what was going on, and then call me names for not knowing in the first place. As if she'd do any better with someone like Autumn! I'd be surprised if anyone had ever kissed Leigh in her entire life.
Ugh, I have so much actual stuff that matters to worry about, why is all I can think about Autumn.
[Filter: Public]
Well, Miss Lydia, I did what you asked and replaced Autumn's ruined shoes for her. You were right, I think she nearly swooned when she removed all of the wrappings, and she's been showing them off all day. You might have even seen her, actually.
She's like the cat in the cream.
(no subject)
Aug. 31st, 2010 06:06 am[Filter: Private]
I didn't really learn anything.
Well, that's not true.
I didn't get the right answer just handed to me. I heard a lot of interesting different perspectives and arguments. And I sort of just want to listen to all of them. I wish one were way more convincing than another, but comparing what King Reuben said, what Prince Reeve said, what Prince Julian said ...
I know what sort of King I'd like to be. I want people to respect me as a person more than I want them to be so impressed with me they want to do what I say. That's just what I'm like. That's probably why I'm having such a hard time just clamming up like I have been. But ... I don't know what sort of a King Hanalan wants me to be. Normally, I'd say it is someone they can relate to. Maybe not the courtiers, or the rich, but the country folk ... people like ... like Harold and Gherta and Haylie ... normally, that would be what they wanted. I think so, at least.
But after the Honeysuckle Treason -- who can even say, anymore? Isn't a King you respect more likely to make you feel safe after something like that? And that has to be what people want more than anything else, right now, just feeling safe. But I don't know. I really don't. Maybe having someone who stays separate from them will just make them worry that something is wrong. Maybe a King who tells them about his shoes would make them feel more safe ...
...
[Filter: Leigh]
Hey, I've got a question.
I didn't really learn anything.
Well, that's not true.
I didn't get the right answer just handed to me. I heard a lot of interesting different perspectives and arguments. And I sort of just want to listen to all of them. I wish one were way more convincing than another, but comparing what King Reuben said, what Prince Reeve said, what Prince Julian said ...
I know what sort of King I'd like to be. I want people to respect me as a person more than I want them to be so impressed with me they want to do what I say. That's just what I'm like. That's probably why I'm having such a hard time just clamming up like I have been. But ... I don't know what sort of a King Hanalan wants me to be. Normally, I'd say it is someone they can relate to. Maybe not the courtiers, or the rich, but the country folk ... people like ... like Harold and Gherta and Haylie ... normally, that would be what they wanted. I think so, at least.
But after the Honeysuckle Treason -- who can even say, anymore? Isn't a King you respect more likely to make you feel safe after something like that? And that has to be what people want more than anything else, right now, just feeling safe. But I don't know. I really don't. Maybe having someone who stays separate from them will just make them worry that something is wrong. Maybe a King who tells them about his shoes would make them feel more safe ...
...
[Filter: Leigh]
Hey, I've got a question.
(no subject)
Aug. 25th, 2010 04:46 pm[Filter: Royalty and Political Figures]
... yeah, so someone suggested I should do this a few months ago and I've been thinking about it a lot and nothing is getting better, so I just figured -- uh, why not?
Since the Honeysuckle Treason, all of it, I've really ... realized a lot about what it means to be in charge of people. Be a leader. And in Floran right now, I'm being that. My father is a weak King and the people need someone to rely on, and I'm doing everything that I can to be that person. I know I'm young. But they need somebody, and they're my people, and I really, really do feel like I owe it to them to try and be that somebody.
The hard thing is knowing how human you can be.
There's so much going on in my life! And I've always just written here about everything that goes through my head, for more than five years, now! And I liked that! But now I have to worry about what people think of me and and how I appear to them and image, and, and, I just don't know how much to write here! Is it okay to talk about how I don't know what the hell to do about Autumn hanging off my arm? Or about how I gave myself a bitch of a cut shaving this morning? Or how I can't seem to find a single pair of boots in the entire city that fit my stupid feet? I swear, they're like ten times bigger every morning ...
I just don't know. And I was wondering -- like, how do you all handle that? What do you think about it?
It's so complicated, being in charge.
... yeah, so someone suggested I should do this a few months ago and I've been thinking about it a lot and nothing is getting better, so I just figured -- uh, why not?
Since the Honeysuckle Treason, all of it, I've really ... realized a lot about what it means to be in charge of people. Be a leader. And in Floran right now, I'm being that. My father is a weak King and the people need someone to rely on, and I'm doing everything that I can to be that person. I know I'm young. But they need somebody, and they're my people, and I really, really do feel like I owe it to them to try and be that somebody.
The hard thing is knowing how human you can be.
There's so much going on in my life! And I've always just written here about everything that goes through my head, for more than five years, now! And I liked that! But now I have to worry about what people think of me and and how I appear to them and image, and, and, I just don't know how much to write here! Is it okay to talk about how I don't know what the hell to do about Autumn hanging off my arm? Or about how I gave myself a bitch of a cut shaving this morning? Or how I can't seem to find a single pair of boots in the entire city that fit my stupid feet? I swear, they're like ten times bigger every morning ...
I just don't know. And I was wondering -- like, how do you all handle that? What do you think about it?
It's so complicated, being in charge.
(no subject)
Jul. 8th, 2010 08:21 pm[Filter: Private]
I really, really miss Leigh.
It's so much worse than I thought it would be, and it just gets worse every day. I feel like I'm just drowning in all of this. There's so much to do, so many people to deal with, so much stuff to keep straight. I don't have a second for myself. I'm losing track of everything that matters, and I'm not even sure -- what do I do? What do I change, what --
Leigh would know.
[Filter: Kelita]
Well, today's the big day, huh? Are you nervous at all?
I really, really miss Leigh.
It's so much worse than I thought it would be, and it just gets worse every day. I feel like I'm just drowning in all of this. There's so much to do, so many people to deal with, so much stuff to keep straight. I don't have a second for myself. I'm losing track of everything that matters, and I'm not even sure -- what do I do? What do I change, what --
Leigh would know.
[Filter: Kelita]
Well, today's the big day, huh? Are you nervous at all?
